“Like omg. Okay like this was like so funny. like when i was at party over the weekend. Their was like this rlly cool thing like happening. it was like so totally cool. omg it was like really cool though. k. think of it like being really cool and then you will know what i'm talk about.”
To some this, may seem like an over exaggeration of sorts. You may be saying to yourself that no one actually uses this type of language. If you could even call it that. You’d be right, sort of. No one should be using it, but alas. People do.
However, there are others of you who see this as a perfectly reasonable way to hold a conversation, by using horrendous grammar and using the phrase “like” an unneeded amount of times. To all those people whose see this as a totally feasible way to speak, this goes out to you.
The truly horrid part is the fact that the example above was taken, with “permission”, from an actual conversation between two people. Or was it three? No matter. If before, you thought I was just making all this up to get federal funding for my research. You’d be wrong. It’s an actual problem and I’m just doing my part as a concerned citizen to help. The grant money would be appreciated though.
Is it possible to actually stop this “degenerate speech/babble“, because it’s way too late to prevent it? I’m glad you asked that. Believe it or not. I prefer that you believe it. There is still hope for the young-uns. It starts with trying to eradicate the use of the word “like”. Not when using a simile or something similar. But when used for…..it’s such a useless phrase, that I can’t even form a reason as to why it’s used in the first place. But, the way it is used today, leads to other muck ups with language. Sort of like how the government tells us that marijuana is a “gateway drug”. When really it’s the easiest way to open yourself up creatively.
Anyways, “like” opens up the usage of even more deadly, incorrect language practices. Like having little to no details in a story that your telling or having so much unneeded details that everything that your saying becomes pointless. I’d rather not pollute the internet with an example of that. Suffice it to say that it’s pretty bad.
This part is a mere assumption but, I think “like” also gives people the ability, of sorts, to completely give words whole new meanings. Like for instance, how mad is used. Or they could just be doing this to make me mad.
This is why I believe “like” should just be completely thrown out from, wherever. In the hopes that it won’t be used for evil again. We could just come up with a new, more intelligent way to compare things anyway. I mean, we’re America. We can do anything we want.
It seems that I’m not the only one trying to combat this “evil”. The car company, Jetta, has entered themselves in this too. You may know what I’m talking about. Well here it is if you don’t.
It looks like they made a public service announcement on this problem in the disguise of a really funny car commercial. Pretty sneaky sis. If you look real carefully, you can see the words "stop it" or at least something very similar.
It says pretty clearly what I’ve been saying for years. That if you use “dumb” words, you're destined to die. Probably in a car crash. It’s a grim fate, I know. But the truth is not always rose blossoms and butterfly kisses, I’m afraid. I’d hate to call it an act of God, kind of like AIDS but…he ain’t no fool.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
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